Ms. Bitch: Finding happiness is the best revenge. Read online

  They’d been at a happy hour the year before, just a small gathering of friends and a few of their cousins, and Tess had just had her first big success – one of her books had made it onto the USA Today bestseller list. Their cousin William had been congratulating Tess on making the list when Vicki had wandered over.

  “Thanks, I’m really excited about it.” Tess smiled at her cousin, feeling proud that her creative work was being recognized. As an artist, it was difficult to put her books into the court of public opinion. She did her best to not let negative reviews sting her, but Tess was still working on building a thicker skin. The USA Today bestseller recognition was a huge step toward building Tess’s confidence.

  “How much money have you made from it?” Vicki, her eyes glittering with the tell-tale sheen of too many vodka sodas, had nudged her way into the circle. It was the first time she had directly acknowledged that Tess had even written any books, let alone asked her a single question about her work.

  “Excuse me?” Tess raised an eyebrow at Vicki as their circle of friends shifted uncomfortably around them.

  “How much money have you made? I mean, you’re this big bestseller, right?” Vicki laughed, turning to try and include the group, who all found other things to look at. “You must be rolling in it now.”

  “It’s nice to enjoy some success from this book,” Tess demurred, her cheeks heating in embarrassment at Vicki’s continued questioning.

  “Blah, blah, blah,” Vicki said. “Give us the goods. How much?”

  “Vicki… I don’t really know. I’d have to look at vendor costs and all my expenses,” Tess stammered.

  “Yeah, right. You know,” Vicki said, shrugging and turning to the group, effectively dismissing her. “Did I tell you guys that I got a huge promotion at work? Plus, I get three weeks more vacation. I think maybe we’ll finally put in that pool we’ve been talking about.”

  Tess had faded away from the circle, dipping into the bathroom to pat water on her cheeks, and to force herself not to cry. It didn’t matter, not really, what Vicki thought of the books or if she was in some sort of silent competition with Tess on who made the most money. All she’d ever wanted from Vicki was a sister – in the truest sense: a relationship where they could celebrate each other’s wins and support each other during their lows. Instead, every time she and Vicki had a conversation she felt like she was trying to cross the street with a blindfold on.

  They had the pool now, Tess realized, and smiled at the stewardess who brought her lasagna with a warm roll served on actual dishes instead of throwaway plastic cartons. Vicki had the pool, the promotion, and the perfect family – though Tess suspected her marriage still struggled – and from what Tess could see, Vicki was none the happier for it. If anything, the strain of trying to be perfect, of constantly working toward the next big thing to buy or show off to the neighbors, was winding her into a tight ball of anxiety.

  Tess bit into her flaky roll and looked back out the window where blue water could be seen far below. Perhaps that was why Vicki was so angry with her, because she didn’t give a shit about keeping up with the proverbial Joneses. As far as Tess was concerned, the Joneses could have their perfect house, indiscernible from every other house on the block, and they could spend their time gossiping over the neighbors, basing their self-worth on a sliding scale of comparisons, all while silently drowning in their own unhappiness.

  If this was a competition, Tess happily conceded.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  The island welcomed her like a lover returning to bed, enveloping her in sunshine and scents, the colorful rhythms of scooters weaving in and out of traffic, tourist stores hawking their wares, and music – music everywhere – making Tess’s pulse pick up in excitement. Here was a vibrancy of life, a casual comfortableness of being, that Tess craved. To wake up next to the ocean each day, wave to people you know on the street, and to live somewhere that people used their precious vacation time to visit was something that fascinated Tess. Did the people who lived here take it for granted? It wasn’t without its issues, Tess noted, as she observed more than one run-down shack, drunken tourist, and wandering stray dog from the cab window on the way to the hotel. But wasn’t that every city? No place was perfect, and no matter how hard the suburbia of America tried, striving for perfection had a way of intoxicating people so they ignored the cracks in the foundation. Or, as one of her friends used to say, a polished turd was still a turd.

  “It’s best to examine the ugly side, for it’s the broken bits that make it interesting,” Tess whispered, pressing her fingers to the glass as they passed a smiling woman sitting on a crumbling stone wall, bouncing her baby on her knee.

  “Pardon?”

  “Lo siento.” Tess smiled at the cab driver. “Yo hablo conmigo.” She hoped she’d just told the driver in her halting Spanish that she was speaking with herself. He just gave a friendly nod and pulled to a stop at her hotel. In moments, she was deposited on the curb. Sweating in the heat that clung to her, she rolled her suitcase to the check-in desk where a cheerful young woman greeted her. Tess half-listened as they tried to entice her into viewing a presentation in the morning on joining some sort of special members’ club, which she knew meant watching a slideshow on timeshares. She gave her thanks when they finally handed over the key to her room and directed her down a wooden pathway that wove over a small pond where the same flamingos she’d met earlier this year honked at her. Happy to be on her own, miles away from real life, Tess all but bounced her way to the little bungalow that housed her room, grateful to be truly disconnected for the first time in months.

  The irony wasn’t lost on her as she immediately connected to wi-fi and checked her messages, but how else was she supposed to check in on her friends’ arrival? Seeing a message from Kathy asking if she could get them reserved on the first dive boat of the morning, Tess checked the time and realized the dive shop was closing shortly. She’d just have time to get there and put their names on the list if she hustled.

  Couldn’t they have built this hotel less sprawling? Tess grumbled as she hoofed it over to the beach where a little hut of a dive shop was nestled, its large gear room and changing areas tucked behind it, a brightly colored red-and-white dive flag blowing in the wind. Tess arrived, dripping in sweat, with ten minutes to spare and looked around for someone to help her. A cheerful laugh caused her to turn, and for a moment, Tess was blinded by a ray of sunlight piercing across the ocean, the late afternoon sun casting a warm glow on the man who now smiled broadly at her over the counter of the dive hut. Tess froze, her gaze drinking in the bluest eyes and brightest smile she’d seen in ages. When he beckoned to her with one finger, she went – immediately sucked into this man’s gravitational force.

  “Welcome! What can I help you with today?” the man asked, his blue eyes dancing, the faint wisp of the Scottish Highlands tingeing his accent. For the first time in her life, Tess understood what it meant when a woman felt like swooning.

  “My…” Tess desperately wanted to say it was her sex life he could help her with, but cleared her throat, and handed him her dive certification card instead. “My paperwork for diving this week. I need to reserve spots on the boat for tomorrow for myself and two friends.”

  “Sure thing, here you go.” The man – Aiden, his name tag read – handed her a form and took her dive card, turning to answer a question from another diver who had stopped by the counter. Tess did her best to sneak glances at him, surreptitiously wiping the sweat from her face as much as she could, annoyed when her arm stuck to the paper she was filling out. Of course, the island had to have about a thousand percent humidity going on at the moment, Tess thought, then smiled brightly when Aiden returned to her.

  “All set?” Aiden asked, his blonde curls haloing his head, and Tess almost caught herself sighing.

  “Yes, I’m good.” Tess peeled the paper from her arm and handed it to him with a sheepish grin. Clearly used to sweaty tourists, he didn’t blink an eye a
s he reviewed her questions and then picked up her dive card again to fill in the necessary information.

  “Hey, that’s a really beautiful photo,” Aiden said, holding the card up to look at the photo and back to her. Tess blushed at the compliment, doing her best to not fidget under his assessing gaze.

  “Thanks, it’s my author photo.” Her hair had been professionally styled and makeup carefully applied, a far cry from the frizzy-haired drippy mess that she was certain she presented to him now.

  “Is that so? What do you write?” Aiden leaned in for a chat and Tess blinked up at him, for a moment having lost the power to speak.

  “Um… romance. And murder mystery. Mainly romance though,” Tess stammered, then reminded herself that she was a writer, for god’s sake, and she could at least make an attempt to be more articulate.

  “I’m a character in a book,” Aiden said, gracing her with his smile once more. “But my mate killed me off. Not very sporting of him, but at least I died in glory.”

  “Doesn’t sound like he’s a good mate if he killed you off,” Tess pointed out.

  “Nah, it’s the Scottish way. A bit of banter between friends is all.” Aiden shrugged, confirming the accent for Tess.

  “Gruesome banter,” Tess mused. “Seems about on par for a Scotsman.”

  “’Tis the best kind, lassie.” This time Tess almost did swoon. Never in her life had she thought she’d actually hear someone say ‘lassie’ in real life and mean it. “I’ve got you all set for tomorrow, though I’m sad to say I won’t be diving with you.”

  “You won’t?” This made Tess suddenly incredibly sad as well. “That’s too bad.”

  “I’m set to leave for a dive show in the UK in two days, so I am on dry land until then. We dive so much here that I’m just giving myself a little extra time out of the water before a long flight like that.”

  Tess felt herself oddly deflated at the notion he was leaving. “That makes sense, I know the no-fly regulations after diving are quite cautious.” She just stood there for a moment, but realizing she had nothing left to say, she took her dive card back. “I’ll see you in the morning then. Thanks for your help.”

  “No problem, always glad to help.” Aiden held her gaze for a moment longer than necessary. She wondered what else he’d help with if she was brave enough to ask. Biting her tongue, Tess hightailed it away from the dive hut before she sweated all over the handsome Scotsman and fainted at his feet.

  “Lassie,” Tess repeated and laughed, clutching the image of him to her heart, and wondered why it felt like this man was going to have a place in her life. This happened to her sometimes – a knowing about a thing or a place, where she could almost see the impact of something or someone on her future. It had happened, just there, with Aiden. For once, Tess decided not to examine it too deeply – they lived in different countries and the man was leaving for the UK in two days – so she shoved the feeling aside and navigated her way back to the bungalow across the palatial hotel.

  Tomorrow would bring what it would bring.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  “So, what’s your favorite book?” Aiden asked. He had found Tess straightaway the next morning among the group of divers that crowded the dive shop in various stages of undress as they geared up to go out on the boats for the day. Tess’s insides warmed at his nearness, as yesterday they’d had the buffer of a counter between them. Now he stood before her, barefoot and smiling, and she realized she still had to look up at him. It was nice, she realized, to have a man taller than her to look up to.

  Not your man, Tess reminded herself, though her dreams the night before had told a wildly different story. Maybe it had been the tequila at dinner, or the tropical locale, but when Tess had finally found herself back in her room for the night, she’d immediately drifted into a sleep that involved some decidedly naughty dreams about the Scotsman. Now, standing next to him once more, Tess’s gaze landed on his mouth and she blushed at the thought of where that mouth had been in her dreams.

  “Um, that’s hard to say, really,” Tess stammered, her brain refusing to pick an answer. “I read a lot and having just one favorite is almost impossible to choose. From childhood? Recent years?”

  “Sure, any of them,” Aiden said, and Tess noticed he was careful to keep his eyes on her face, though she stood before him in a bikini top and wetsuit half-pulled on. Buying herself a bikini for the trip had been a big deal for her, as she’d always worn tasteful one-pieces. Gabe had tended to grab her stomach and tell her she needed to work on her problem areas. Tess would never be a skinny girl – she just wasn’t built that way – but she was trying to overcome her confidence issues.

  “I really liked The Power of One growing up,” Tess blurted out, forcing herself back to the conversation and away from past insecurities.

  “The little boxer kid in South Africa?” Aiden squinted in thought and Tess found herself admiring the laugh lines that crinkled at the corners of his eyes.

  “Yes, that’s the one.”

  “I don’t think I’ve read it, but there was a movie, no?”

  “Yes, there was. I haven’t seen it, though.” Wanting to know more about him, she leaned forward. “Do you get a chance to read much?”

  “I try to, but honestly, I’m so knackered after a day here that I’m lucky if I stay awake for dinner. It takes me a while to read books because I fall asleep quickly when I’m reading.”

  “Is this a tough job?”

  “It’s an amazing job, but you have to love diving. Sometimes we’re doing four to five dives a day and it really does take a toll on your body. It’s not surprising that many of us use our days off to sleep.” Aiden smiled at her, and the call went up for the boats to leave.

  “I guess I have to go,” Tess said, suddenly far more interested in staying on land.

  “You’re with a great instructor today and diving on some stunning reefs,” Aiden said, fading back into the group as he waved to her, already turning to answer questions as divers clamored around him. “Have fun!”

  “I will,” Tess murmured, but he was already gone, swallowed up by the seemingly endless rush of people around him. Tess could now see why he was exhausted at the end of the day. She couldn’t imagine having to answer that many questions, let alone dive every day on top of it.

  She wondered if he had a girlfriend.

  Shaking her head, Tess followed the dock to where Kathy and her husband, Brian, waited for her by one of the five dive boats boarding to leave for the day.

  “Who’s the guy?” Kathy asked, her shrewd eyes missing nothing.

  “Just an instructor here.” Tess shrugged.

  “He’s cute,” Kathy said, “though I’d cut his hair.”

  “I like the hair. It’s kind of got the surfer vibe going,” Tess said automatically, and caught Kathy giving her a sly grin.

  “Oh, stop.” Tess laughed. “He’s leaving to go back to the UK. He won’t even be here this week.” She handed her gear over to a crew member on the boat.

  “Doesn’t mean you can’t get to know him,” Kathy pointed out.

  “Maybe,” Tess demurred and then shut her mouth as the boat left the dock, motoring across water so blue it made her eyes sting. She listened dutifully as the instructor gave the dive briefing. Despite herself, she kept gazing back toward the dock, wondering if she could just catch one more glimpse of blonde curls.

  “Girl, you got it bad,” Kathy whispered, bumping her shoulder against Tess’s.

  “Oh, hush, I do not.” Tess shoved Aiden from her mind, letting the excitement of her first dive in ages clamor in.

  And what a dive it was, with crystalline waters and the current whisking them over reefs teeming with life. Feeling instantly at home in the water, Tess delighted in floating past a turtle, who poked his head up to eye her balefully as she took a picture from a respectful distance. When a nurse shark cruised by, she smiled around her regulator. She’d hoped to see sharks on this trip; they were her absolute fa
vorite. The water soothed her battered soul, seeming to fill the cracks, reminding her there were many ways to mend a broken heart.

  When they surfaced, waiting as a group for the boat to pick them up, Tess took her regulator from her mouth and laughed. It didn’t matter the stress that waited for her back home, or the raw newness of having to start her life over again – if she could steal moments like this for herself, her future wasn’t looking so bad.

  The boats dropped them back at the resort for a lunch break, the divers chattering down the dock in excitement over all the beautiful things they’d seen that morning. Tess had already made several new friends, and loved how a hobby like diving could bring people together so quickly. She supposed it was the element of danger that helped to form fast friendships, for when you were underwater with someone, you needed to practice good buddy skills. It was nice knowing that people had her back, Tess thought, because not everyone in her life had been that reliable.

  “We’re sitting over by the pool if you want to join us,” Kathy said, motioning with a tray in her hands to where a group of divers clustered under a thatched palm umbrella.

  “I…” Tess spied blonde curls across the dining area and saw Aiden sitting by himself. “I’ll see you on the afternoon dive boat.”

  Kathy followed her gaze and, though she smirked, didn’t comment on the direction Tess was already heading.

  “See ya in an hour,” Kathy said, a smile hovering on her lips as she went to meet the group.

  Tess wandered over to where Aiden sat and stood awkwardly by his table until he looked up from the paperwork in front of him.

  “Mind if I join you?” Tess asked, uncertain of her welcome.

  “Of course, please, sit.” Aiden pushed his paperwork away and leaned back to smile easily at her.